Being home is interesting. Especially since I didn't want to be here. At all. My last couple of weeks at Oberlin were kind of filled with this anxiety of what was to come when I finally returned home. And so, of course, for the almost two weeks I've been here, I have not enjoyed myself. The worst was the huge black cloud of dread that hung over seeing my friends from high school. Yeah, I'm sure I've changed a bit, but I like the person I've morphed into. I wasn't prepared to hear from my peers that I was different, and not necessarily for the better.
Embarrassingly, I've pretty much avoided leaving my house for all this time, until yesterday. Three days before I left Ohio, I received a Facebook invitation to the 'celebratory fiesta' that my friend Gaby is notorious for hosting. Instead of a 'birthday fiesta' or 'graduation fiesta,' the theme was 'reunion fiesta.' I confirmed my attendance on Facebook, panicked in my head, and decided there was no way I was going to show my face. Really classy. The day of, I didn't think about the party at all. At 7:00 pm, I was sitting on the couch in sweatpants and a torn up t-shirt. At 8:30 pm, I was still in sweatpants and that disgusting t-shirt but I was in the car, on my way. For someone who was embarrassingly undressed and beyond fashionably late, I possessed this insane newfound courage. Or maybe I was just tired of sitting in my house alone. Who knows. For about five seconds, it was awkward. Everyone's life was extravagantly different, as well as us all being a little different in person, but these are the people who made high school worthwhile. Friendships like that never change much.
Amidst all the stories and catching up, I explained Winter Term to my friend Sarah and told her of my plans. January of each year, students at Oberlin have this thing called Winter Term where we're expected to do some sort of project of our choosing 'to pursue academic interests outside of Oberlin's regular course offerings.' Nice, I know. This year, in addition to an internship with a pediatric psychologist, I've decided to read all nine Toni Morrison novels and keep a reading journal. According to Sarah, many of the students in Columbia's journalism program also keep an online blog. She suggested that I start my own blog, in order to keep a few good people up-to-date with my readings and what not. So here I am. Ta-da.
Just being honest, I haven't thought of myself as much of a writer since eleventh grade when Mrs. Behrens consistently gave me C's on everything I wrote. Everything. Also because I know so many writers that are much, much better than myself (ahem, Sarah), I'm pretty positive it isn't my calling. So, in the real world, I'll stick to chemistry and calculus, but I'm actually going to try this. Just don't expect brilliance.
Chinwe
